Quick recap of today's game

Haven't gotten a chance to rewatch it yet, but I wanted to offer up a quick recap of today's Birds-Broncos game as best I remember it.

FIRST, SECOND, THIRD AND FOURTH QUARTER

Go Makers Mark.

Up a Rivers Without a Defense: Bolts 33, Birds 30

Sandwiched between a coming-out party of sorts on national TV in Washington and an emotional home game against Andy Reid's Chiefs was this game. The Chargers had just coughed up a huge lead against the Texans and blown their season opener in a manner very befitting of head coach Norv Tur...wait, what?

So even with this game being the home opener and the Philly debut of Chip Kelly, the Chargers game was almost an oversight. Naturally, what usually happens in overlooked games happens - the Eagles ran headfirst into a dumb, purple trap. (If you're gonna beat us, at least have the decency to do it in those beautiful periwinkle jerseys. Home, away, alternate, don't care. Just wear them all the time, for crying out loud).

It was an exciting, back-and-forth affair, but those are a lot more fun to go over when it's a W. Regardless, I have a job to do, so let's get this over with.

First

Nobody, and I mean nobody, works harder to get kick returns out to exactly the 25-yard line than Damaris Johnson.

Things start looking pretty similar to last week, with Jackson and Avant getting quick completions. Speaking of working hard, nobody works harder to make a three-yard gain out of a two-yard loss than Shady McCoy. Legitimate MVP possibility here.

Vick eventually takes a sack, though, and then gets hurried by Dwight “I’m Still Alive, Guys” Freeney. Punt time.

It takes no later than the first San Diego play from scrimmage for Nate Allen to grab Ryan Mathews’ face mask.  Phil Rivers guides the offense pretty effortlessly down the field for a guy who perpetually looks mad that his mom is making him make his own grilled cheese sandwich for once.

Hmph.

Hmph.

BUT MAAAAAHHHHHHMMMM!

Connor Barwin notches a sack to slow down the drive, and Danny Hard-On-Blow-Job can’t penetrate deep enough through the defense to pick up a first. Nick “Not Nate Kaeding” Novak boots one right down the pipe from 48. 3-0.

First play of the next drive, McCoy takes a wheel route catch and runs forever and ever. The 70-yard catch is the longest of his career. Brian Westbrook career-long was 62. Carry on.

After a couple Bryce Brown runs up the gut (Shady is on the sideline hurt/tired/scaring the shit out of everyone), Vick rolls out on third and goal from the 2 and hits James Casey as he stumbles into the end zone…except the ball squirts out while he rolls across the goal line. No catch, no touchdown, and no more touches for James Casey for the next eight weeks.

The field goal unit comes on to tie it, but the Eagles get flagged for somehow lining up in an illegal field goal formation, because it’s apparently possible to fuck that up too. 

"Wait, really?"

Henenenenenererererey knocks it in anyway, though. 3-3.

Chargers get backed up by a penalty on the kick return, but Rivers goes right back to picking the secondary apart.  Malcolm Floyd makes a catch near the sideline that could’ve just as easily been complete as incomplete. Refs call it a catch. Chip challenges and loses. Mad props to anyone who gets this.

Also, I'm really sorry.

A swing pass to Danny HOBJ ends the quarter as Nate Allen pleads with the ref to call it incomplete. “Listen man, my boss is gonna be pissed when he finds out I let this happen again..”

Professional blog is professionally done.

Second

Two plays in, Eddie Royal continues storming towards relevancy, turning a quick out into a touchdown.

10-3. Remember those three good games Eddie Royal had his rookie year when everyone picked him up in fantasy? Good times.

Shady’s back in. Vick goes deep to DeSean and hits him perfectly if the field were about two feet wider than it is. Shady picks up the first anyway.

Next play, Vick can’t decide whether he wants to pump-fake blitzing Charger linebacker Jarret Johnson or throw it over him, so he decides to just throw the ball at the ground instead, because sure, why not? It fortunately rolls out of bounds before anyone on San Diego can grab it, but it loses 11 yards, though it also diverts attention from Lane Johnson getting flagged for being off the line of scrimmage at the snap. A sense of déjà vu comes over me as I hear the familiar “Penalty on number 65, offense” ring through my speakers. Where have I heard that before….?

"Beats me."

That play basically kills the drive, about as badly as Jahleel Addae kills Bryce Brown on third down. This is the best video I could find for it. I’d really rather not meet the person who filmed it.

Rivers and coach Mike McCoy begin the “bleed the play clock and call a million audibles on every play” strategy on this drive, because Phil Rivers is Peyton Manning now. The Eagles finally break up a pass, but it’s pass interference on Cary Williams, so forget it.

Eagles eventually force a stop. DeMeco rips off HOBJ’s helmet on third down, exposing his pale, goblin head to sunlight for the first time in 18 months.

Not Nate Kaeding bangs another one home. 13-3.

The defense gets an abridged rest as Vick leads a swift scoring drive. Two deep strikes to DeSean, a quick scramble, and an absolute bullet into to the end zone to Football Mike Richards, who wrestles the ball from Derek Cox like it was black suffrage. 13-10.

Literally every white guy on the team goes to celebrate with him, plus Damaris Johnson, who I guess just doesn’t know any better.

Rivers keeps gashing the Eagle D over the middle with Antonio Gates and Malcolm Floyd. Before the game, there was a lot of talk over how the Eagles would defend Gates – use a safety? A linebacker? Maybe bracket coverage? – and it seems like Billy Davis went with the more progressive “don’t cover him at all” strategy for the most part. Brandon Boykin looks pretty good defending a bomb to Vincent Brown at least.

Then, holding on No. 77 of the Chargers. Wait, who’s number…

YES! THE KING IS BACK! It’s weird not hearing him get flagged for dumb penalties in his traditional No. 65, but it’s a reminder that, with all the turmoil and change in today’s world, there are a few things you can just always count on.

I’m going to have to work on the audio for this, but trust me when I say, there’s a play at the 2:33 mark of the second quarter where Phil Rivers yips like a dog being zapped with a taser when he snaps the ball. It’s great. It’s easily the best part of this play.

Oh yeah, and Boykin tomahawk chops the ball out of Antonio Gates’ arms as he tries to get into the end zone.

But really, this play is all about Rivers making a sound like a smarting poodle. We all know this.

Marty Morhniweg sneaks onto the field and steals Pat Shurmur’s headset. The offense goes three and out.

Rivers hits a streaking Malcolm Floyd on the right sideline, then Cary Williams gets flagged for PI again. Overcome with joy, Ryan Mathews celebrates in the traditional Fresno State way, by coating his hands and forearms in three-day-old bacon grease. He coughs it up on the next play, and Kendricks recovers.

Remember all those breaks the Racistnames caught last week? Yeah, it's nice to get a couple of those, eh?

Vick sails a couple throws as he gets hit, but Shady picks up the offense and moves them across midfield. Vick hits DeSean over the middle to get within field goal range, and DeSean celebrates in the traditional Cal way, by trying to pick a fight with the guy covering him.

Henery, distraught by either the fight or the fact that he’s the most European-looking guy from Nebraska ever, pushes the 46-yard kick right. First miss of the year. Whatever. Rivers sits on it to end the half.

Third

Don’t even know what to say about Malcolm Floyd except for, Jesus, man. Terrible.

After the extended timeout to cart Floyd off the field, Rivers continues to do absolutely anything he wants, all while bleeding the play clock down to 3 seconds on every play. Cary Williams gets called for PI again, but his man catches the ball anyway.

Dipshit Ronnie Brown is still alive and has two somewhat operating legs. Who’da thunk it?

On the last play of the drive, Davis drops eight Eagles back into coverage, which is apparently not enough to keep Eddie Royal from being wide the fuck open. Touchdown, Disco Bolts.

20-10. Cary Williams continuing to follow up his strong performance against Washington with an absolutely horrific all-around game.

Next drive, Vick scrambles away from pressure and launches one to DeSean…who lets it glance off his fingertips.

Bruuuuutal.

A few plays later, Vick finds DeSean for an easy TD…except Lane Johnson didn’t line up on the line of scrimmage when the play started, which is against the rules. Insufferable prick Phil Rivers even knows this and starts waving his towel around to prove it.

God. The worst.

Eagles can’t pick up the first, so Henenenenenenery comes on and knocks one in from 48. 20-13. Lane Johnson slowly beginning to transform into King Dunlap.

Defense finally forces the Chargers to punt on a three-and-out. Nice deflection by Boykin on a deep 3^rd-down attempt. Probably could have picked it off if he’d given it a shot.

Two plays into the next drive, Vick and DeSean roast Shareece “Yep, I Was Born With This Name” Wright to the tune of 61 yards and a TD. 20-20.

‘Bout time.

Defense heads out for another 25-minute Charger possession. The great safety play continues as Patrick Chung gets nailed for defensive holding. Any chance Blaine Bishop is still available?

The quarter ends with another HOBJ catch out of the backfield and taking it up near midfield. It’s crunch time, baby.

Fourth

The Chargers keep on dinking and dunking, picking up about 73 third down conversions in the process. Rivers goes end-zone for Gates, but Earl Wolff, aka Not Chung or Allen, breaks it up. Chargers settle for a field goal a couple plays later, and it’s 23-20.

Vick hams it up to try and get a late hit call as he runs out of bounds and gets bumped by Addae. Oh, Mikey, you sly dog.

Vick hits Avant, then overcomes a false start penalty with a long toss to Ertz. After working down to 3^rd and goal at the 2, the offense runs the most unstoppable play in the goal line playbook: Vick rolls left with the option to go short to Shady, go end-zone to Cooper, or run in for the score himself. He goes with Plan C, and the Eagles have their first lead.

27-23. 7 minutes left, which means only enough time for another 35 offensive drives per side.

Apparently, DeSean does something dumb that warrants a 15-yard penalty. Which makes sense, but since no cameras caught him doing it, we have only his version of events, which certainly sounds like something he’d do.

This actually turns out to be a big deal, because Fozzy Bear Whittaker gets to return the kickoff from the 10 instead of taking a touchback in his end zone. Colt Anderson knocks the ball out of his hands. It bounces right to Henery, who slides but can’t come up with it (not very good at handling balls). A bunch of Eagles and Chargers dive for the ball and can’t recover, knocking it further and further into Eagles territory until Chargers safety/special teams ace/some guy Darrell Stuckey scoops it up and rolls to the Eagles 38.

It takes three minutes and seven plays for Eddie and the Royals to make another appearance.

30-27. As so many have said before, you can’t stop a talent like Eddie Royal; you can only hope to contain him.

Turns out Royal got sprung on the screen by the King himself, who finally found someone he can successfully block: Nate Allen.

I GOT 'IM, MA! I GOT 'IM!

Nice work, King. Good boy.

Vick’s first throw is a little behind Avant. For some reason, this made me think how insane this offense would be if Maclin was healthy. Man.

After the first throw, Vick looks sharp as a tack the next few plays, quickly (perhaps too quickly) and efficiently (perhaps too efficiently) moving things down the field. But on first and goal, Vick gets absolutely wrecked by Jarius Wynn right after releasing the ball.

Vick has to leave the game for a play, according to DA RULES…unless Chipper calls timeout and subs him back in after. Chip’s still learning the ol rulebook, though, and puts in Nick “White Lightning” Foles for one play, enough for Foles to overthrow DeSean in the end zone just before the two-minute warning.

"Well guys, it's been real. See you in like three months."

Vick comes back in for third down, but his pass for Avant is knocked away by Marcus Gilchrist on a play Cary Williams would surely have been flagged for.

Henery’s kick goes left, then right, then left, then right, then left, then right again before wiggling inside the left upright. Sheesh. 30-30, with 1:52 left for Prick Rivers to play with.

"Mmm mmm mmm, I can almost taste the victory Subway I'm about to CRUSH, man. Gonna be CRUSHING some MAD Subway after this, dawg."

Antonio Gates. Remember him? Billy Davis doesn’t, because there are still 0 people successfully defending him. I legitimately don’t know if Gates is healthy and spry again, or if Davis put concrete knee braces on each of his players before the game.

The D finally forces Rivers to throw a ball away, which mostly just magnifies how little pressure they’ve gotten on Rivers to that point. Strong showing by the San Diego O-line, but this was a frightening lack of success by the Birds front seven.

HOBJ picks up a short third down in the flat. The Chargers burn a timeout. HOBJ runs up the middle to center the kick for Not Nate Kaeding…then Kelly calls timeout, because….um….uh…well…ahahahaha. This happens two more times, allowing the Chargers to get closer and closer.

So let me level with you for a second. There are a lot of things in this world I don’t understand. I don’t understand basic medical science. I don’t get why the college kids who wander around Main Street think they’re actually impervious to the damage that can be caused by my car colliding with them. I can maybe name like four Supreme Court justices on a good day.

But I don’t think I will ever understand why Chip Kelly decided to use all his timeouts with 20 seconds left in a tie game and the Chargers on the periphery of field goal range. Absolutely none. I know more about Clarence Thomas than I know about that strategy. (To be fair, I probably know more about Clarence Thomas than Clarence Thomas does)

Not Nate Kaeding lines up with 11 seconds left, and slides a 46-yarder inside the left upright. 33-30.

But remember, this is not excessive celebration. Not at all.

Squib kick, failed hook-and-ladder, and you can all go home now.

Couple thoughts:

·      This is kind of what you can expect from this team this year. For the 20-25 seconds they were on the field, the offense looked fantastic. The defense is simply...not good. One punt, two turnovers, and a kneel down to end the first half were the only Charger drives that didn’t result in points. And the San Diego offensive line manhandled any Eagle pass rush and blitz.

·      The “Shady McCoy for MVP” discussion can begin right now.

·      Phil Rivers looks like a completely different football player from the past two seasons. He’s still human junk. Mike McCoy is your early Coach of the Year candidate.

·      Michael Vick hasn’t looked this on-point since 2010. Which means, watch him turn it over a half dozen times Thursday night.

·      Speaking of which, tomorrow night is Reid-McNabb-palooza. Not gonna lie, there could be a tear shed here at the No Doubles Offense household. Also, the Thursday night games are still the worst part of football season.

Fly, Eagles, fly.

"Well, There's Something You Don't See Everyday." Eagles 33, Racistnames 27

Last year, I started this blog to dump all my Eagles writing, but I quickly found my favorite part of the week was re-watching the games and recapping them with a whole bunch of pictures and dumb jokes. Maybe it was somewhat cathartic because last year’s team was so terrible. Maybe I need to get some friends. But one way or another, I’m going to continue that this season, starting with last Monday’s game in Washington.

Usually, I’ll preface these recaps with some little blurb, but almost everything that could possibly happen in a football game happened in this game, so for the sake of keeping your attention…

FIRST QUARTER

Damaris Johnson decides not to take the kickoff out from eight yards deep, so that’s a start.

Vick strolls to the line, hits Football Michael Richards on a six-yard hitch, and then, it’s off to the races. Sixteen seconds later, it’s Celek down the seam for 28. DeSean breaks open a screen for 16 more.  Shady picks up 6 on a draw. This takes us all the way down to the…14-minute mark of the first quarter.

After missing Celek on a post drag and Shady picks up three more, it’s 4^th and 1 at the Washington 21. Kelly leaves the offense in for a McCoy draw play that picks up the first down. We’re less than two minutes into the Chip Kelly era and he is already all out of fucks to give.

Vick misses DeSean in the endzone, then Shady cuts a draw play across the entire field to get inside the 5. Already looking naaaaaasty.

Then, less than three minutes into the game, the drive comes to literally the worst possible end you can imagine. Remember last year’s Arizona game where the Eagles had the ball on the Cardinals’ goal line and everyone (well, I) figured the worst thing that could happen was the Eagles run out of time and fail to even get a field goal? And then Kerry Rhodes threw the blindside Hit Stick on Vick and James Sanders ran it back 98 yards for a Cardinals touchdown? Yeah, those were the salad days, all right.

Anyway, back to Monday, where in this case, surely the worst thing that could happen would be that the Eagles somehow stall and end up with just a field goal, right? Right?

Nope. Ryan Kerrigan decides to go all J.J. Watt on us and swat Vick’s next pass. NO NO NO, NOT TODAY. Okay, no biggie, incomplete pass, now it’s second and…hold on, where’s DeAngelo Hall going with the ball?

That arrogant dipshit. Doesn’t he know he’s gonna get a delay of game pen-

Whatever. 7-0 Racistnames. (Hey, Peter King has his way of dealing with things and I have mine)

This is a forward pass every day of the week plus GeoDay (the new eighth day of the week where NFL refs get to pretend they’re experts on parallel lines), but here’s why I wasn’t mad about it:

1. If they’d blown it dead, then it turned out to actually be a backward pass and the quick whistle negated a Washington TD, how much bitching and moaning would we here from their fans? This is the way refs should be handling these types of plays: let it go and then look to see if it should obviously be reversed, rather than blowing the play dead immediately and basically cutting the recovering team’s chance of running the ball back short.

2. This was the absolute flukiest scenario that could’ve closed out the opening drive. Odds of it happening again: zero in a quadrazillion. This was the best the offense had looked in over two years, and had it happened in either one of those years, it would’ve been absolutely devastating because we all knew it would take at least another three games for the Eagles to get that close to the end zone again. After that first drive though….everyone knew something was different.

Case in point: the next drive, which starts with a 22-yard catch-and-run from Vick to DeSean. D-Jax looks like a man ready to run a marathon, far from the guy who was jogging through routes the past two years. Maybe he’s looking for another contract to fund this sure-to-be-a-successrecord label.

McCoy and Bryce Brown push things forward, then Vick misfires on a pair of passes to Avant and rookie tight end Zack “Ertz So Good” Ertz. Ertz then fails to hold onto a 3^rd-down catch with E.J Biggers draped all over him.

Alex Henery goes out to kick the 48-yard field goal, but a split second before the snap, Kelly pulls a Jason Garrett, freezing his own kicker and challenging the incomplete call from the previous play. The challenge is really dumb and the ruling on the field is “confirmed,” rather than just “standing,” which is really a huge middle-finger to the challenging coach. “Hey, we thought we were right before, but thanks to your dumbass challenge, we’re SUPER right now!”

Henery bangs home another 48-yarder anyway because he’s an automaton droid. 7-3.

RGIII finally gets to lead the Racistname offense onto the field to a chorus of cheers. The first play is a handoff to Alfred Morris, who immediately coughs it up after being hit by Trent Cole. Mychal Kendricks recovers, and it’s Birds ball. Mike Shanahan begins scouting the sidelines for crippled kids he could potentially put in at running back over Morris.

Vick gets a million years in the pocket on the next play and makes them pay. DeSean in the back of the endzone. 10-7.

After two crummy Washington plays and a penalty, RGIII throws to Santana Moss in triple coverage, because if there’s one guy you want to count on to out-jump three defenders, it’s 80-year old, 4-foot-2 Santana Moss. Brandon Boykin picks it off.

Eagles get backed up by a Jason Avant pass interference penalty and Vick taking a sack. New not-awful punter Donnie Jones (we’ll miss you, Chas Henry, and by that, I mean you suck) pins the Racistnames at the 5.

After Villanova grad Darrel Young drops a short pass on first down (protip: if it’s not Brian Westbrook, you probably shouldn’t have any Villanova football players on your team), RGIII and Morris screw up a pitch play in their own end zone. Safety city. 12-7. Eagles get ready for their fifth drive. There are just under five minutes to go in the first quarter. Christ.

Vick scrambles for a first, but the drive bogs down and the Eagles punt. By the way, this is what it looks like when everyone on the offensive line blows their cut-blocks.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!"

Racistnames run a couple plays to FINALLY get to the end of the first quarter. Everybody take a deep breath.

Second

RGIII looks bad. No zip on any passes. Punt.

The Racistnames start coming up lame with “cramps,” as learned in Master Thespian's School of “ACTING!” Tom Coughlin even thinks this is a bit much. The only guy on the Washington defense who maintains any sense of pride is Kerrigan, who is a friggin’ animal and sacks Vick to end the drive.

Griffin and the offense go nowhere. Another punt.

Vick hits D-Jax on a crossing route to pick up a 3^rd down conversion. A step or two after Jackson gets out of bounds, DeAngelo Hall gets his Roy Williams on and horse collars him to the ground. Flags everywhere. DeSean goes after DeAngelo in return, but amazingly doesn’t get a flag. Yes, it was a childish reaction, but he got pulled down on a late hit in a way that legitimately could’ve ended his season. I’ll give him a pass this time.

Two plays later, Vick sells the play-action and zips one to Celek, who bounces off one guy and strolls into the end zone. 19-7. 

At this point, the Eagles have run 22 pass plays and 22 rushing plays, and I need a glass of water and an oxygen tank.

Three and out by the ‘Names, highlighted by a Cary Williams sack on a corner blitz.

Shady and Bryce shoulder the load for the next drive, gaining all but the last three yards of the drive. Those three go to Vick, who rushes in on the option play. 26-7. 

The Eagles are basically playing an entirely different sport than they were last year.

The ‘Names take a bunch of penalties and basically give up on the next drive. Halftime. Also, LeSean McCoy is already your league leader in rushing yards. Chip Kelly has, for the time being, broken football.

THIRD

Well, it’s been like twenty minutes since the Racistnames turned the ball over, so they’re due. Cary Williams extends for the pick

Damn.

Vick gets knocked out of bounds on the next play and takes like half the Racistnames with him.

Next play, Shady gets jiggy with it. Good grief.

33-7. This is as good a time is any to remind you all that LeSean McCoy apparently says his last name to himself every time he jukes a guy out. Everyone in a white shirt throwing blocks on this play, too. It’s a thing of beauty.

This is when things get a little dicey. Emphasis on “a little.” Griffin leads a pretty nice drive, picking apart the Eagle secondary. The ‘Names get into Eagle territory for the first time all night, then advance into the red zone, only to be slowed up by a DeMeco Ryans sack and a drop on 3^rd down.

Then Kai Forbath blows the field goal because FUCK you, Mike Shanahan.

Shady comes out after a nice run on the next drive, and everything goes to shit. Celek takes two penalties in one play, and an illegal formation call backs the punt team up somewhere near the Botanical Gardens. Shady takes some time to get a good butt massage.

Finally, the Racistnames break through. Griffin completes a few to Fred Davis, hits Garcon on a perfectly timed screen, and gives it to Morris on a zone-read handoff in the red-zone. Paydirt.

33-14. Enjoy it now before you get benched for some scrub in Week 8, Alfred.

Mike Tirico: “If the defense can come up with a big play here, they’re not totally out of this one yet.” Two plays later, Jason Avant fumbles. Go to hell, Mike Tirico.

Just get down, Jason. I mean, yeah, effort and hustle and extra yards and all that, but jeez, man.

A couple plays later, it’s Griffin tossing it to Leonard Hankerson, who beats Jordan Poyer for six. Yep, it’s that time of the game when Jordan Poyer is getting PT.

33-20, after the ‘Names blow the 2-point conversion.

Vick takes an option play for a 36-yard run, then comes up gimpy after the tackle because Mike Vick is a reckless 5-year old boy with ADHD who happens to be made of fine china.

Kelly’s offense doesn’t prove nearly as adept at bleeding the clock. The drive ends with a punt.

Griffin starts completing every single throw. The defense looks gassed, having been on the field a vast majority of the second half. Jordan Poyer is still on the field a whole lot for some reason.

Eagles escape after a great deflection by Cary Williams on 4^th and 15, though, and the offense takes over on downs. If he’s going to play this well all year (which I don’t think he will, but still), Cary Williams can miss every voluntary training camp ever and he’d be okay in my book.

Vick and the offense run off some clock and force the ‘Names to burn their timeouts. Moss takes a fair-catch punt at the 10 with 3:42 to go. Certainly, with Washington out of timeouts, down by 2 touchdowns and with 90 yards between them and the end zone, the Eagles have done enough for their defense, as in-flux as they are, to protect this lead even if they stay in the prevent defense the entire time. Certainly!

“Not if I have anything to say about it!” – Patrick Chung.

33-27. Seriously, are you kidding me, Patrick Chung? Who do you think you are, DIKEMBE MUTO---okay, I’m done. Holy hell though, even Rahim Moore thinks Patrick Chung mistimed that.

Racistnames boot the onsides kick right to Avant, who bobbles it for just long enough for everyone to go into cardiac arrest. Eventually, though, the refs give the ball to the Birds, and it’s ballgame.

wipes sweat off brow

OTHER NOTES:

--Mychal Kendricks and Fletcher Cox looked great. Cox had two sacks and Kendricks racked up a ton of tackles and the fumble recover. Would be really nice for Kendricks to become the supremely athletic counterpart to DeMeco Ryans’ veteran savvy in the middle.

--Even when the Eagles were in the prevent for a big chunk of the second half, the ‘Names were beating blitzes with well-timed short passes and screens. Still, the Eagles still won the time of possession battle, 32:39 – 27:21.

--Shady looked otherworldly, but I wouldn’t mind seeing a little more Bryce Brown and Chris Polk in the second and third quarters to save his legs.

--I’m serious about the Alfred Morris thing. Hear me now, believe me later, Roy Helu will be the starting running back in Washington by Week 8. This is coming from someone who has Alfred Morris on his fantasy team too, for what it’s worth.

--The San DiegoSuper Chargers (very important song in that link) roll into town for the home opener next week. No more Norv to kick around, but at least we still get to watch Phil Rivers act like a baby back bitch. And really, that’s almost better than a win.

Fly, Eagles, fly.